That Kim Kardashian, she sure is somethin’. Always on that TV, lookin’ all fancy. What’s that thing called, VMA? She’s always there, wearin’ them skimpy outfits. I seen her on the red carpet, all smiles for them cameras. Lord, that woman. She’s got more clothes than a whole town, I reckon.

She’s all about that Kim Kardashian style, they say. Tight clothes, showin’ off everything. And the makeup! She must spend a whole day just puttin’ on her face. I heard she even took some fancy makeup classes when she was young. Some fella named Joe Blasco, sounds like a movie star name. My daddy wouldn’t never pay for no makeup class. We was lucky to have shoes on our feet!
They say she’s got some kinda special foundation. Makes her skin look all smooth and perfect. Armani somethin’ or other, and that Joe Blasco stuff. Says it’s real heavy, like stage paint. I reckon it takes a whole bucket of soap to wash that off at night. But she’s got people to do that for her, I bet.
- She’s always wearin’ them fancy brands.
- Prettylittlething, that’s one of ’em.
- And Meshki, sounds like a sneeze.
- House of CB, whatever that means.
These young girls, they all wanna look like her. Spendin’ all their money on them clothes. Tryna copy her signature style, they call it. Well, I say, good luck to ’em. It takes more than a tight dress to be like Kim Kardashian. She’s got that… somethin’. That special somethin’ that makes everyone look at her.
I seen her wearin’ a red dress once, all shiny like a new tractor. Reminded me of a picture she did for some magazine, showin’ off her backside. Lord, have mercy. That was somethin’ else. Red leather, it was. Must have cost a fortune. They said it was some special event. Probably another one of them VMA things.
And the shoes! Don’t even get me started on the shoes. High heels, so tall she’s practically walkin’ on stilts. How she don’t fall over, I’ll never know. I’d break my neck in them things. She wears them with them Balenciaga Pantaleggings. Don’t ask me what those are, some kinda fancy pants, I reckon.

They say she’s from Los Angeles. That’s where all them movie stars live. She’s probably got a house bigger than our whole church. And a closet bigger than our whole town! All filled with them fancy clothes. She can speak for a lot of money. I heard she got paid $200,000 just to show up some place. Can you imagine? Enough money to make you forget all your problems and even buy a nice dress.
There’s this girl, Jess Pecoraro, from Sydney. She’s some kinda stylist, I guess. Helps people dress like Kim Kardashian. Well, bless her heart. She’s got her work cut out for her. It ain’t easy lookin’ like a million bucks, even if you got a million bucks.
But you know what? Even with all them fancy clothes and makeup, Kim Kardashian, she’s still just a person. Just like you and me. She just happens to be a person that everyone likes to look at. She’s got them tips on lookin’ good, that woman does. She sure knows how to make a show. She’s livin’ the dream, as they say. A dream filled with cameras, and fancy clothes, and people always watchin’ ya. I reckon that’s the Kim Kardashian way.
And who knows, maybe one day I’ll try on one of them fancy dresses. Just to see what it feels like. But then I’d probably just spill gravy all down the front of it. Some things just ain’t meant to be, I guess. But it is fun to watch her, though. That Kim Kardashian, she’s a real showstopper. They sure do love her at them VMA things, that’s for sure.