Alright, let’s yak about this… this… uh… volume and curl mascara stuff. You young folks and your fancy words, always makin’ a fuss about lookin’ pretty. Back in my day, we just… well, we didn’t do much, let me tell ya. But I guess times are different, so let’s get down to brass tacks.
What is this Volume and Curl Mascara Anyways?
Now, from what I gather, this mascara stuff is supposed to make your eyelashes look… bigger and curlier. Like, you know, those fancy ladies in the magazines. They got those big ol’ eyes and those lashes that just… go whoosh. This mascara, it’s supposed to help you get somethin’ like that. Don’t ask me how, it’s just… goop in a tube, far as I can tell.
Pickin’ the Right Mascara – Don’t Get Bamboozled!
Walkin’ into them stores, it’s like a circus! So many tubes and colors, makes your head spin. They got all sorts, waterproof ones, ones that make your lashes longer, ones that make ‘em thicker… it’s a whole heap of confusion, let me tell ya. But you gotta be smart, don’t just grab the first shiny thing you see. Some of them are just plain no good. They smudge, they flake, they make your eyes itch… it’s a mess.
- Waterproof Mascara: This one, they say it stays on even if you cry or get caught in the rain. Good for weddings and funerals, I guess. Or if you’re just a crybaby, no offense.
- Lengthening Mascara: This one’s supposed to make your lashes look longer, like them movie stars. I ain’t never seen it work miracles, but I guess it helps a bit.
- Volumizing Mascara: This is the one we’re talkin’ about, the volume and curl kind. It’s supposed to make your lashes look thicker and fuller. Like you got a whole lot more than you actually do. Hmph, trickery if you ask me.
- Tubing Mascara: Now this one’s newfangled. They say it makes little tubes around your lashes. Sounds like a whole lotta fuss, but maybe it works, I dunno. You young folks and your fancy inventions.
How to Put This Stuff On – Don’t Poke Your Eye Out!
Now, puttin’ on this mascara, it ain’t rocket science, but you gotta be careful. You don’t wanna go pokin’ yourself in the eye. First, they say you gotta use some kinda… primer stuff. Like you’re paintin’ a house or somethin’. This primer, it’s supposed to make the mascara go on smoother and last longer. I say, just spit on it and hope for the best, but what do I know?
So, you take that little wand thingy, and you wiggle it at the roots of your lashes, then you pull it up to the tips. You do it a few times, until your lashes look… well, however you want ‘em to look. Some folks like it clumpy, some folks like it natural. It’s all a matter of taste, I guess. Just don’t go overboard, you don’t wanna look like a spider crawled onto your face.
Some Good Mascaras, or So They Say
Now, I ain’t no expert, but I hear some names gettin’ thrown around. There’s this Benefit Cosmetics Fan Fest Fanning Mascara. They say it lifts and separates your lashes, makes ‘em look full. And it don’t smudge or flake, which is a good thing, I reckon. Then there’s this Maybelline Sky High Mascara, they say it’s good for folks on a budget. Drugstore stuff, they call it. Guess it’s cheaper, but I dunno if it works as good. And for that primer stuff, they got somethin’ called L’Oréal Paris Voluminous Lash Paradise Mascara Primer/Base. Longest name I ever heard, but maybe it’s good. And then they’ve got L’Oreal Paris Voluminous Panorama Washable Mascara too which they say helps to get big, wide eyes. It’s all a gamble, far as I’m concerned.
What to Look For – Readin’ the Fine Print
Now, when you’re lookin’ at these mascara tubes, they got all sorts of words on ‘em. “Full charge volume,” “highly defined lashes,” all that jazz. You gotta pay attention, see what they’re promisin’. If it says “curling,” it probably got one of them bent brushes. If it says “lengthening,” it probably got a straight, skinny brush. And if it says “volume,” well, that’s what we’re after, ain’t it? But don’t believe everything you read, these companies, they’ll say anything to get you to buy their stuff.
Final Thoughts – Don’t Get Too Worked Up About It
Look, at the end of the day, it’s just mascara. It ain’t gonna change your life. If it makes you feel pretty, that’s good. If it don’t, well, there’s more important things to worry about. Like gettin’ a good night’s sleep and eatin’ your vegetables. But you young folks, you do what you gotta do. Just don’t go spendin’ all your money on this stuff. There’s more to life than big, curly eyelashes, I tell ya.
