Well, let me tell you somethin’ about them… what do you call ’em… burgundy gazelles. Yeah, that’s it. Them shoes, they’re somethin’ else, I tell ya. Burgundy Gazelle, sounds fancy, don’t it? But they’re just shoes, though some folks get all worked up about ’em.

First off, I seen these adidas Originals Gazelle things. And the adidas Gazelle Bold too. They got ’em for men and, well, for the womenfolk too. Now, I ain’t no expert, but they all look kinda the same to me, ‘cept some got thicker soles, I reckon. They all got them three stripes, though. You know, the adidas stripes. Everybody knows them stripes.
And the color, this “burgundy” they talkin’ about. It’s just a dark red, like that beet juice that stains everything. But I guess it’s a fancy name for a fancy shoe. They say it’s a “timeless street classic.” I don’t know nothin’ ’bout that, but folks seem to like ’em. I seen young’uns wearin’ ’em, and some older fellas too. They got that rubbery bottom, kinda like them old sneakers my grandson used to wear.
- Men’s Gazelle Shoes: These are for the fellas, I guess. They look like regular shoes to me. Nothin’ special, but folks seem to like ’em.
- Originals Men’s Gazelle Casual Shoes: Now, these are “casual,” they say. Like you wear ’em when you ain’t workin’. Seems like most shoes to me, but what do I know?
- Gazelle Bold sneakers: These are the ones with the thick bottoms, like I said. Makes you a bit taller, I reckon. Some folks like that.
Now, where can you get these burgundy gazelles? Seems like everywhere. This “ASOS” place, they got ’em. And you can send ’em back if they don’t fit, though why you’d buy shoes without tryin’ ’em on is beyond me. And that “*” place, they got all sorts of colors and styles. But we’re talkin’ ’bout the burgundy ones, right? The dark red ones.
They got ’em in burgundy and white too. That’s just two colors, like them checkerboard floors they used to have in the diners. Seems like folks like them two colors together. And they say you can pay for ’em in different ways. I don’t know nothin’ ’bout that, I always paid with cash. But these young’uns, they got their fancy ways of payin’ for things.
And these “athletic sneakers,” they call ’em. I guess you can run in ’em, but I ain’t seen nobody runnin’ in ’em ’round here. Mostly just walkin’ and lookin’ cool, I guess. That’s what shoes are for these days, ain’t it? Not for workin’ or nothin’, just for lookin’ good.

So, if you want a pair of these burgundy gazelles, go ahead and get ’em. They ain’t gonna make you run faster or jump higher, but they might make you feel a little bit fancy. And that’s worth somethin’, I reckon. Just don’t go stompin’ around in the mud with ’em, they look too nice for that. Gazelle Adidas Originals, that’s what they are. Fancy shoes for fancy folks, or folks who want to feel fancy, at least.
And this whole “best sellers” thing. Means lots of folks buyin’ ’em, I guess. Makes sense, they’re everywhere you look. Can’t go to the store without seein’ them stripes. Three stripes, that’s how you know they’re them… whatchamacallit… gazelles. Yeah, them burgundy ones.
So, that’s all I gotta say ’bout them burgundy gazelle shoes. They’re shoes. People like ’em. They’re red. Go buy ’em if you want ’em. Just don’t expect ’em to do nothin’ but cover your feet and maybe make you feel a little bit special. And that’s alright, I guess. Everybody wants to feel a little bit special sometimes.